vanehwasreal:

my sister sent me a text saying “for the next 30 years you have to live with one person in the same room all the time. afterwards you have to kill them. would you choose someone you like or someone you hate?”

I have never been more distraught in my entire life

j0hnlemm0n:

skills i have mastered

• not texting back

• procrastinating

• eating copious amounts of food in one setting

• painting my nails like a blind pre-schooler

• sleeping a lot

• being single

kellinsbum:

so i walked into my brother’s room he was asleep and i knocked something over and he said “if you’re a ghost or some shit please fuck off im too tired for this”